


safety and home

by casgirlsam



Series: Castiel's Bday Bash [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Platonic Cuddling, Polyamory, There Was Only One BedTM, V polycule, and they hate it, the boys need snuggles, the need for snuggles not the snuggles themselves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-21 00:14:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20684297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casgirlsam/pseuds/casgirlsam
Summary: In which Castiel, Sam, and Dean learn the healing powers of snuggling





	safety and home

**Author's Note:**

> suuuuup it's castiel's birthday and what better way to celebrate that than with snuggles??? also i'm counting this as a winchester wednesday fic because cas is a winchester, deal with it
> 
> unbetaed because i'm bad at deadlines and eryone is asleep

> “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully ‘round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”--C.S. Lewis

* * *

Listen, Castiel was tired. He was tired from riding in the Impala all day. Tired from having to put up with two emotionally constipated brothers who would rather snip at each other in sharp short phrases than talk about what’s bugging them.

And he was tired from giving them the silent treatment because he was annoyed.

No one said Castiel was the bigger person here.

They end up just inside Wichita city limits around midnight when Castiel snaps. He pulls out his phone and silently books a hotel room online. “Dean, we’re stopping for the night. Turn left here at the light.”

“We’re only three hours away from home, Cas.” Dean grumbled. “We ain’t stoppin’.”

“Fine. Then stop the car. I’m going to lodge for the night.”

“No.”

Not one to be out-stubborned, Castiel opened the car door at the stoplight once the Impala was slowed down enough and jumped out.

“Cas, what the hell?! Are you crazy?!”

Castiel turned and stood in front of Dean’s window and raised an eyebrow as he leaned down. “Dean Winchester, I am exhausted. I have been trapped in a car with two adults that are acting like children and I can’t stand another minute in that environment, let alone another 3 hours.”

The traffic light illuminated the inside of the car enough for Castiel to see Sam look down at his hands, embarrassed. Dean stared at Castiel for a moment longer before he sighed, shoulders slumping. “Alright. We’ll stop.” Castiel attempted to hold back the smug look on his face. “Yeah yeah, whatever, just get in the damn car.” Apparently an attempt that was unsuccessful.

Ten minutes later saw them at the hotel. A corporate chain that Dean scoffed at when he saw it, but another glare in the mirror from Castiel quashed any other complaints. Once parked, Castiel headed towards the lobby.

At the desk sat an older woman with short white hair, feet propped up on the desk looking bored while watching one of the TVs on the lobby wall. She stood as she saw Castiel, feet sliding slowly to the floor and face as bored as when Castiel walked in. “Can I help you?”

Castiel held back the very human reaction of wanting to roll his eyes at her. “Yes, I’m Castiel Campbell. I’m here to check in.”

The woman--Gladys, her gold name tag declared-- clacked on the keyboard for a moment and then produced a printed 8x11 receipt. “Sign here.”

Castiel went to sign when something caught his eye. He furrowed his brow in confusion and asked, “I thought this was a room with two beds?”

Gladys looked at him from over top her glasses. “It’s what you booked and the only one vacant. Is that a problem?”

Castiel weighed his options. Mention there were three persons that needed roomed and not have a place to stay or accept his mistake and figure it out with the brothers. He plastered on his best fake smile. “No, none at all. I’m just new to hotel booking.”

Gladys huffed a sarcastic laugh, but said nothing further as she handed him the key card and pointed in the direction of the room. “Down that way, and to the left.”

* * *

Five minutes later and the three exhausted men walked in the the door to their lodgings for the night.

Dean cleared his throat. “Um, Cas?”

Castiel’s face was beet red as he started to pull out his pajamas and toiletry bag to get ready for bed. “Yes, Dean?”

“Why is there one bed?”

“Yeah, uh, not for nothing, but this is awkward.” Sam piped up, his face doing a good impression of Castiel’s at the moment.

Castiel took a moment to compose himself and looked at them both, eyes trying to convey a level of calm. “Why is it awkward? Because I’m in a relationship with you both?” Okay, maybe he was still annoyed from earlier.

“Cas, come on, man!” Dean protested.

Castiel raised his eyebrow at both of them. “You both need to get over not wanting to talk about it. As they say, you need to ‘Grow the fuck up’.” If his hands weren’t full, air quotes would have accompanied that statement.

Sam cleared his throat this time. “You’re right, Cas. I’m sorry.” He sat on the bed. “It’s just that… Dean and I haven’t shared a bed since we were kids, is all. It’s weird.”

“If it helps, I was planning on being in the middle.”

Dean snorted. “Like a buffer?”

“No, because I’m selfish and want to hold both of you.”

“Cas, buddy, that’s—“

“An amazing idea, actually.” Sam finished.

Dean opened his mouth, assumedly to protest, but then sighed. “Okay.”

Once everyone was dressed and ready for bed, Castiel turned down the bedding and laid directly in the middle of the queen sized bed, arms up underneath the pillows in preparation for the other two to join him.

Sam looked at Dean, the brothers having what looked like one of their silent conversations. Finally, Sam rolled his eyes and slide in on Castiel’s right side, arms and legs wrapping around the former angel.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Gonna leave some room for the rest of us, ya giant octopus?”

Castiel smiled. “Dean, there is always plenty of space for you in my arms.”

Dean flushed as he got in, grumbling something about cheesy ass angels. He pulled the blankets over top of them and turned away from the other two in an attempt to curl in on himself. Castiel was not having that. He wrapped his left arm around Dean’s middle and pulled him close. Lips met freckled neck. “Good night. I love you.” A mumbled reply. Castiel turned and kissed Sam’s forehead. “Good night. I love you.”

“Mmm, lo’e you, too.”

Much sooner than anticipated, Castiel fell into a dreamless sleep, surrounded by safety and warmth.

When Castiel woke up later that morning, he found he couldn’t describe how he felt. Like…. Warm from the inside out. So much so that the few hours he managed to get felt more rejuvenating that perhaps they should have been. Sleep disorientation was a real thing, though, Castiel found out, as he couldn’t figure out right away why he felt warm and safe on either side of him.

It was an interesting and pleasant change to say the least.

He looked to his right. Sam’s nose was buried in the side of Castiel’s neck, snoring softly.

Castiel smiled fondly at the sight and looked at the brother lying in his arms on the left.

Dean looked more relaxed than Castiel could ever remember seeing him. His mouth hung open and drooled had pooled into the collar of Castiel’s sleep shirt.

His eyes trailed down to his torso where Sam was gripping the tshirt there and Dean… Castiel felt his heart in his throat.

Dean had at some point in the night reached out and grabbed Sam’s wrist. Overcome with emotion over such a small yet meaningful gesture for the eldest Winchester brother, Castiel placed a lingering kiss on Dean’s forehead, Dean choosing that moment to wake up.

Dean stretched, releasing Sam’s wrist. He blushed as he remembered the sleeping arrangements. “Um. Good morning, Sunshine.”

“Good morning, Dean. Sleep well?”

“Mmph.” Came the mumbled reply from Castiel’s neck.

Sam woke up next, long limbs stretching out and over top the bed’s other occupants.

“‘Morning, Octomoose.” Dean grumbled.

Sam flipped off his brother as he placed a good morning kiss on his side of Castiel’s neck. “‘Mornin’.”

Castiel grinned, not able to contain this overwhelming feeling of… love. Yes, that’s what that feeling was. He felt it more intensely at this moment for some reason. He wasn’t sure why, but what he did know was that he never wanted that feeling to go away.

* * *

They never talk about it. Everything goes back to normal.

Well, almost. One thing that changed is that they don’t ignore the topic of Castiel’s relationship with the both of them like they had been. The mere mention no longer made Dean shut down conversations. He had reluctantly admitted to Castiel that it  _ did _ make things easier to plan and map out; DO NOT TELL SAM I SAID THAT.

Then one night, Castiel was sleeping soundly in his own room when his door creaked open. He blinked up at the figures standing in the doorway, eyes straining slightly from the sudden light. “Sam? Dean?” He jumped to his feet as quickly as his still-sleepy brain would let him.

They moved from the doorway and met Castiel in the middle of the room. Castiel’s brain caught up finally that there was no physical danger, no enemy that a blade could vanquish. He reached a hand to Dean’s cheek and one to Sam’s. “What happened?” He whispered. Sam shrugged and Dean cast his eyes downward.

Castiel may not have been an angel anymore, but he could feel the pain coming from the two brothers. For a moment, he was also proud of how they were willing to come to him for comfort at the same time.

He moved his hands down slowly and grasped each of their hands in his. One silent step at a time, he led them to his bed, stopping to kiss each brother tenderaly on their foreheads.

This time, Dean faced Castiel, face buried into his neck. Sam assumed his position from last time, this time making sure that an arm was around Dean as well.

Castiel felt the brothers relax instantly. “Good night,” he whispered, just like that night weeks ago. “I love you.”

Again, the three woke up more rested than they had ever felt but this time, they actually acknowledged each other without being snide.

Dean stretched, kissed Castiel good morning, and patted Sam’s arm that was still wrapped around Castiel’s middle. “‘Mornin, Sammy.”

Sam stretched and groaned the sleep out of his bones. “‘Mornin.’”. Castiel felt lips touch his neck. “‘Mornin, Cas.”

Still, though, no one talked about the emotionally charged cuddling.

It continued on and off for a few more weeks just like that. No one discussing what was happening, the effects they were feeling… Until Castiel had a nightmare.

* * *

_ It was horrific. Dean and Sam had been trapped and dying. Castiel could feel their souls fading as if he still had his Grace. But try as he might, he couldn’t see them. He was surrounded by nothing but darkness and void.  _

_ He could feel them and hear their faint voices calling for him. Damn it, why couldn’t he find them?! _

_ “Sam?! Dean?!” he screamed frantically, running this way and that in the vast emptiness. Their life forces were getting dimmer and dimmer by the second until-- _

“No!” Castiel thrashed awake, sweat pouring down his face. Wait a second. Face. Hands. Face-hands--

* * *

Two strong hands cradled his face. “It’s okay, Angel.” the hands’ owner soothed in a familiar timbre.

Castiel blinked and squinted at the voice. “Dean?...” he turned and saw Sam gripping tight to one of his shoulders. “Sam…” his dream was coming back to him. Relief flooded him at seeing his two loves alive.

“Yeah, we’re right here,” Dean said, tone reassuring.

Castiel broke down and fell into Dean’s arms and grabbed Sam’s shirt to pull him into an awkwardly positioned group hug. “Please,” he sobbed. “Please I… I need you both here tonight. I need to make sure you’re both… both with me when I wake up.”

Sam adjusted himself and Castiel and laid them down, Dean following them down. Sam took his usual position behind Castiel, limbs wrapping around and making sure to include Dean. Dean peppered Castiel’s cheeks, lips, eyes with kisses while Sam did the same to the parts of Castiel that were in reach.

“Good night,” Dean whispered.

“We love you.” Sam finished their good night ritual for these nights.

The next morning, Castiel was rested and damned determined to talk about this whole snuggling thing.

As the brothers woke up and went to make their leave, Castiel held up a hand. “Wait,” The two turned around, confused. “We all need to talk about this.”

Dean opened his mouth. Castiel held up a pointer finger. “Let me talk.” he sighed. “It’s very much obvious that we all sleep better when we’re together. Correct?”

Slowly, the brothers nodded.

“But you both still find it awkward because you think that cuddling together with me means something other than us finding comfort in each other?”

Two more nods.

“That’s, as they say, ‘complete bullshit.’” This time his hands were free and air quotes came out to play. Dean was too embarrassed to even try and stop them. “You are allowed to seek physical comfort from each other. Grown men or no.

“We all need to be honest with each other when we need this level of comfort. Especially before it gets as bad as last night. We can all benefit from this. You can count on me to come to you both, but I need you to promise me right now that you’ll extend that honesty to me as well.”

Again, more slow nods. Dean fiddled with the corner of his tshirt.

“Thank you.” He stood and kissed the both of them. “I think this calls for breakfast.”

* * *

Their little family may be weird to others, no doubt, but no harsh words could ever diminish the feeling of safety and home when they were together.

This was so much better than fate. This was pure love, given freely, familial and otherwise.

And nothing could stop that.


End file.
